If I mention swearing I know what you’ll say: you don’t like it.
That would also be my response. Anyone who dirties their speech with swearwords must have a pitifully limited vocabulary. Swearing in public is odious. I have been horrified to hear the crudest of words used in front of children.
But then, an experience this week made me question my attitude to swearing.
Let’s first have a look at two things: what swearing is for, and how swearwords are used.
Most swearwords are used for sexual appendages, sexual acts, or toilet functions.
This throws up an interesting point. When we describe these events we have little choice but to use the language of the gutter, the nursery, or an anatomy textbook. There is no reasonable, adult vocabulary available.
Perhaps then, for natural acts, it would be more honest to unselfconsciously use words regarded as swearwords. But I doubt that will happen. We’ll do what we always do, revert to euphemism – which is, really, avoiding the subject altogether.
If we look at how swearwords are used, the first thing you’d have to admit is that they are widespread. They are a parasitical growth living within English.
But we pretend it isn’t so. While TV soap operas win plaudits for powerfully reflecting difficult issues in everyday life, they certainly don’t reflect the use of everyday language.
Swearwords give shock value and are often used in comedy. Much of what passes for conversation in English is jokes, sarcasm, or witticisms. Shock is often the punchline.
Billy Connolly, my favourite comedian, swears a lot. It seems a natural part of him. Do you laugh with Billy?
Like it or not, swearing is becoming normalised in this country. But not quite yet – which is why I use asterisks below.
It was comedy that made me question my attitude. I was reading a list that added swearwords to literary quotes. Despite myself, I found them funny. To my further surprise, in some cases they improved the quote.
“A horse, a horse, half my kingdom for a f****** horse” makes Richard III sound much more vehement, colourful, and dramatic. And, perhaps, more human.
“It was the best of times, it was the f****** worst of times” piques the interest to a greater degree than the original.
“Last night I dreamed I went to f****** Manderley again” changes the original story’s melancholy tone, affording the second Mrs de Winter some badly-needed shrewdness.
My favourite was: “Romeo, Romeo, where the f*** art thou Romeo”, which I thought transformed the rather wishy-washy character of Juliet into a modern, empowered woman.
You may disagree. If so, tell me.
Word of the week
Fuff (verb)
To spit or hiss like a cat. EG: “Hearing a swearword makes some people fuff like a fat tabby shooed off an armchair.”
Read the latest Oh my word! every Saturday in The Courier. Contact me at sfinan@dctmedia.co.uk
