This week’s hot TV topic has been Davina McCall’s documentary Sex, Mind And The Menopause. But psychotherapist Rachel Weiss from Perth has been a local champion and expert on menopause since 2017.
As she gets set for her next menopause festival, Rachel explains why she’s proud to be at the helm of an organisation empowering women.
Alongside her day job, Rachel created Menopause Cafes around the world, where people share coffee and cake alongside advice, support and discussion on menopause health and wellbeing.
“As I’ve gone through life, friends have told me their stories about the next stages of life, like getting married, having kids, empty nest and so on,” Rachel says.
“But no one had mentioned the menopause.
“It affects about half the population and the other half who live and work with them – but nobody talked about it.
“I watched a programme by Kirsty Wark in February 2017 with my husband. I was thinking, I’m 50, menopause is going to happen sometime.
Range of symptoms
“That programme inspired me. I realised there were psychological, emotional and physical symptoms which weren’t considered and nobody had told me about.
“I had already run death cafes, allowing people to talk about grief, so the programme about menopause motivated me to want to talk about this other ‘taboo’ subject.”
Rachel continues: “We advertised the first Menopause Cafe on my business, Rowan Consultancy’s, Facebook page – and it became the most popular post ever.
‘We didn’t know if anyone would turn up!’
“Two Perth women Lorna and Gayle said ‘we’ll help you’. And then I had to do it! We didn’t know if anyone would turn up.
“But actually people came and said ‘when is the next one?’.”
There have now been more than 560 events reaching thousands of people. Areas of conversation include sleep, anxiety, HRT, and impact on relationships.
“Any given week there is one going on somewhere. Could be Nairobi, Kenya, Connecticut, wherever our volunteers want to host them,” Rachel explains.
“Kirsty kickstarted it with the programme. We wanted to recognise this transition period in people’s lives. Particularly for professional women menopause can be difficult.”
Considering HRT
Rachel continues: “Because we like to control things and it can be a shock to be in tears and not stop. It can be scary and some feel that is a weakness.
“The classic menopause story is ‘it was awful, I took HRT and then my life changed so everyone else should take it’. That’s great but it’s not the only story.
“HRT is not suitable for everyone. We each have to weigh up the costs and the benefits.
“If menopause symptoms are having a severe impact on the quality of our life, then HRT is worth considering.
“The medium term symptoms like hot flushes usually pass after a few years.
“The longer term symptoms like lower bone density, less heart protection and more dryness in the vagina, will continue.
“These can be mitigated with changes in diet, exercise and vaginal oestrogen pessaries (taken locally in the vagina, unlike HRT which affects the whole body).”
Making change happen
Rachel says shame, leading to silence and secrecy, has long been an issue facing women going through the menopause.
But perhaps she, along with Davina, Kirsty and many others, has helped change things.
“Society is getting better at talking about taboo subjects,” says Rachel. “We can change the image of a middle-aged grey-haired woman with her head in her hands, when talking about menopause.
“We talk about pregnancy in our workplaces so why not menopause? Educating and introducing policy will help move that conversation along.
“FlushFest is just one piece of that jigsaw.”
- Book tickets for FlushFest here. Or find out more about Menopause Cafes here.