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Perthshire admin faces up to adult autism diagnosis: ‘I am now grieving the life I could have had’

Sharri was diagnosed with autism last year at the age of 34.

Sharri, 35, was diagnosed with autism last year.
Sharri, 35, was diagnosed with autism last year. Image: Steve MacDougall/DC Thomson

Sharri Blyth had no idea she was autistic until her mum suggested she watch a television documentary about model and reality TV star Christine McGuiness talking about her autism diagnosis.

The 35-year-old senior administrator, who lives in Bridge of Earn, Perthshire, had always felt she was ‘different’.

But she had no idea she had autism until that watershed moment with her mum, Sheila, 57, a year ago.

“In March 2023 I was going through a really difficult time with my mental health,” Sharri explains.

“I was struggling with depression and anxiety, particularly social anxiety, which I had never confided in anyone about.

“I was having a chat with my mum about it and she said to me ‘you know your struggles sound like autistic struggles’.

Sharri with mum Sheila. Image: Sharri Blyth

“She said this after she had watched a television documentary on Christine McGuiness who was talking about her autism diagnosis.

“My mum suggested I watch it.

“I had no knowledge of what autism was and I was shocked.

“I thought – how on earth can someone be 34 years old and not know they are autistic?”

At first Sharri, who also runs her own small business making luxury home fragrance products, was reluctant to consider she might have the condition.

She continued: “But soon any doubts I had quickly disappeared when I started doing some research and I watched the documentary.

“This was when I realised exactly what autism was.

“Suddenly I had an explanation for everything that had gone on in my life.”

What is autism?

Autism is a lifelong neurodevelopmental difference in the way a person communicates, interacts and processes the world around them.

For example autistic people may: find it hard to communicate and interact with others; find it hard to understand how other people think or feel, find things like bright lights or loud noises overwhelming or uncomfortable, get upset about unfamiliar situations, take longer to understand information and do or think the same things over and over.

Autism is a spectrum which means everybody with autism is different.

Some people show signs of autism when they are very young while others don’t display signs until they are older.

What autistic traits does Sharri have?

After doing some research, Sharri recognised she has autistic traits and has had them for many years.

Sharri was aware of feeling ‘different’ from the age of 11.

Sharri always felt ‘different’ even as a young girl. Image: Sharri Blyth.

She explained: “I’ve had social anxiety for as long as I can remember, even around family and friends.

“I live with a persistent feeling of not fitting in.

“And I need a lot of alone time which can come across as being anti-social.

“My brain works in a very literal way and I have difficulty reading between the lines or picking up on what others are thinking or feeling.

“In the past I’ve been accused of being confrontational or argumentative when I’ve simply been trying to gather all the facts I need to make sense of something.

“It can be hard for me to regulate and express my emotions too.

“I’ve been told on so many occasions that I’m heartless or cold.

“I got so used to hearing it that I ended up getting a tattoo on my right foot that says ‘human after all’.”

Sensory issues as a result of autism

People with autism also have hypersensitive sensory issues.

Sharri Blyth was diagnosed with autism as an adult.
Sharri Blyth was diagnosed with autism as an adult. Image: Steve MacDougall/DC Thomson

“I wear a lot of my clothes and most of my socks inside out to avoid labels and seams because I don’t like the feeling of them on my skin,” she said.

“Labels and seams might annoy a non-autistic person, but for someone with autism it’s more than just an annoyance.

“You can’t stop thinking about it and are unable to focus on anything else.

“This is why I have to cut labels off before I wear anything.

“I also have ‘safe’ foods that I eat endlessly out of fear of new unfamiliar textures.

“And I find I cope best with routine which causes me to have repetitive behaviours like watching the same TV show or listening to the same song over and over again.”

The road to official autism diagnosis

Once Sharri had done some research, she was convinced she had autism.

So she contacted Number 3 One Stop Shop which is a service for adults with a diagnosis of an Autism Spectrum Condition (ASC) who live in Perth and Kinross.

The service is provided by Autism Initiatives Scotland.

“Number 3 one stop shop was an amazing support for me,” Sharri explains.

“They were really helpful but explained that getting an official diagnosis on the NHS is very difficult.

“I was told that even if my GP did refer me, the waiting list can be as long as five years.

“I couldn’t wait that long so I decided to get diagnosed privately.”

Being diagnosed with autism as an adult

Sharri obtained her diagnosis from Lynsey Hutchison, who runs Autism Spectrum Consultation and Support.

Sharri spoke to Lynsey initially before going through the official assessment process.

Lynsey assessed Sharri alongside Janet Atherton who is a qualified learning disabilities nurse.

Within two months, Lynsey gave Sharri an official diagnosis in May 2023 with a report sent to her GP.

“I felt extremely relieved when I got my diagnosis and it was a light bulb moment,” Sharri said.

“Suddenly everything in my life made sense and this was the answer I had been looking for all these years.

“For me getting a diagnosis is not about what I am entitled to, it’s more about the validation.

“It was about being able to understand and accept my true self.”

‘Autism often misdiagnosed in females’

Sharri has learned that females with autistic traits are often missed because autism doesn’t present the same way as it does in males.

“When I used to hear the word ‘autism’,  I would think of Forrest Gump or Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory,” she said.

“But not everyone with autism presents in the same way.

“Autism is often misdiagnosed in females. That includes me – I was misdiagnosed all through my life with anxiety and depression.

“Females are really good at hiding or masking their symptoms and this is why diagnosis is often missed.”

Support of family and friends

Sharri feels very fortunate to have the backing of her family, including her partner Kev McIntyre, 36.

Sharri Blyth and partner Kev McIntyre with dogs Kleo and Keva.
Sharri and Kev with their dogs Kleo and Keva. Image: Steve MacDougall/DC Thomson

“My mum and the family were initially surprised after finding out I had autism, but after I explained what it is and how it can present differently in females, they were amazing.

“My partner Kev has been incredibly supportive and he always tells me how brave I am for speaking out about my experiences.

“I have had more support than I ever could have hoped for and I feel so lucky that I have the friends and family that I do.”

While Sharri is relieved to be officially recognised as autistic, she feels her life could have been very different had she been diagnosed earlier.

“Now I have an explanation for why I am the way I am and I am so grateful for that.

“I would never want to change it.

“But I feel I am now grieving the life I could have had, had I known earlier I had autism.

“It would have helped me to understand why I felt so different.

“Had I known, I might have been able to get support or therapy and would have had a more stable life.

She added: “So if my story can help someone else who is in a similar situation I would be grateful.

“Even if it just helps one person, it would be worth it.”