When Sergeant Andy Warren became a father he was serving in Iraq.
Communication with home was somewhere between limited and non-existent.
A short message from base was all he had to tell him he was a dad before it was back to duty in Basra.
It was nine weeks before he met son Callum and the reality of fatherhood sank in as was reunited with partner Lynne.
Fifteen years on, the couple have five children.
Thankfully for all of them Andy’s now much less likely to be deployed for months at a time.
But over the years the couple have learned to navigate the ups and downs of family life sometimes from opposite sides of the Earth.
‘We don’t know Civvy Street’
As Lynne says: “We don’t know what it’s like to be on Civvy Street.
“We were so young when we got together and had our family.
“It can be difficult at times but we make it work. You have to, you don’t have a choice!”
Andy, 39, and Lynne, 39, live in Leuchars with children Callum, 15, Gregor 14, Alfie, 11, and twins Bella and Brodie, 5.
To add to the challenge of having a large family, Brodie has cerebral palsy and uses a wheelchair and Alfie has ADHD, autism and Tourette’s syndrome.
The Warrens’ story will be familiar to those with a military background but alien to those with a less itinerant lifestyle.
During 21 years in the Royal Armoured Corps of the Royal Scots Dragoon Guards, Andy has served twice in Iraq and Afghanistan and also in Cyprus.
As a piper with the regiment’s famous Pipes and Drums, he has also travelled the world playing in such far flung countries as Australia, Hong Kong and the US. He also helped it win a Classical Brit Award in 2009 with an album recorded in Basra.
Lynne said: “There was one year he was only home for six weeks.
“Between army stuff and pipe band stuff he could be away for the majority of the year.”
So Lynne and the children have become accustomed to Christmases with and without Andy and the highs and lows of him returning from and departing for tours of duty.
Indeed Andy was serving in Iraq when the pair met online. It turned out they lived near each other in Edinburgh and went to the same school but didn’t know each other.
When he found out he was a father…
Recalling that moment two years later when he learned they were a family, Andy said: “I thought I was in trouble but they said ‘you’re a father’!”
Lynne explained: “Back then communication was very limited, with him being in Iraq and for security reasons.
“We had to contact welfare and they would contact him. It wasn’t a case of me dropping a text or a picture.”
Andy said: “You get a phone call to say you’re a father but it doesn’t sink in until you meet them yourself.
“It was a bit weird. Knowing you’re half way around the world and your child is at home, you just want to get back to them.”
Nine weeks later Andy was finally able to cradle baby Callum in his arms, as he returned to Edinburgh, where the couple then lived, for a weekend.
Lynne said: “He had to come back from Iraq to go on a course in Bovington [Dorset].
“He came up the road on his first weekend off.”
It was an emotional moment, Andy admits.
A family support system
Lynne adapted to motherhood with Andy in the Middle East.
She said: “I’m very close to my mum and my sister so they were my support system while Andy was away.
“It was difficult but in the same breath I didn’t know any different; that was how it was.
“I always knew when we got together that he would be away for long periods of time.
“That’s just how it was.”
A few months after Callum’s birth the couple married and Lynne and Callum moved to be with Andy in Fallingbostel, Germany, where SCOTS DG were based before Leuchars Station.
Without her mum and sister to rely on, Lynne bonded with the families of other service personnel.
She said: “In Germany we were very tight-knit, you had to be.
“When you’ve got young kids and your family is not there you rely on the network of friends you have made.
Family life in the army at Leuchars
“And they are all going through the same thing.
“Because of the language barrier there are limited job opportunities for spouses.”
By the time the twins were born, the Warrens were back living the UK, with three years in Dorset before settling in Leuchars.
Lynne says children of military families are resilient and get used to moving around. There’s also adapting to new routines when the serving parent returns or leaves home.
When the whole regiment returns there’s the excitement of the welcome home parade.
“After that you have six or seven weeks trying to get back to the normal lifestyle,” said Andy. “Or normal for me!
“You don’t want to be too disruptive because the wife and the kids are used to doing things in a certain way.
“You just get used to it and then you go away again!”
The demands of their family life has led to Andy taking a non-deployable role, so he’s unlikely to be called into service overseas unless there is a pressing need.
Often one parent has to take Brodie to medical appointments while the other needs to be on hand in case Alfie is struggling at school and needs intervention or to come home.
Having served for 21 years, Andy’s time in the military is nearing an end. He’s considering his options for a new career on Civvy Street.
Life beyond the army is unknown territory for the Warrens.
One day Andy wants to be paramedic, the next a plumber.
He said: “I change my mind everyday. I keep telling myself I’ve got three years to think about it!”
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