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Stranger tells Stirling woman she ‘shouldn’t be around kids’ due to self-harm scars

Denise McLaren was told she was a "danger" to everyone around her.

See Me volunteer Denise McLaren, from Stirling, has shared her experience of attitudes towards mental health.
See Me volunteer Denise McLaren has shared her experience. Image: See Me

A Stirling woman who was told she “shouldn’t be around kids” due to self-harm scars says “we need to stop mental health stigma”.

See Me volunteer Denise McLaren was also told she “shouldn’t have a child” by a stranger after they spotted her self-harm scars at a swimming pool in the city.

It comes as the mental health charity calls on members of the public to think about their words and actions regarding mental health illnesses.

Denise has recalled the moment a stranger commented on her self-harm scars while with a friend’s son in the pool.

Stirling woman ‘overheard folk saying I shouldn’t have a child’

The 39-year-old said: “We were in the baby pool when I overheard folk saying that I shouldn’t have a child, or I shouldn’t be able to be around children – not that they knew he wasn’t my son.

“They were talking about me as if I wasn’t there, and said I should be ashamed of coming out ‘in that state’ – that I shouldn’t be allowed in the pool with scars.

“One of them said I was a danger to everyone around me.

“I haven’t been back to the pool since.”

It comes after a poll found 36% of people would not want someone with experience of a mental illness to look after their child.

See Me charity calls for better understanding of mental health illness

According to See Me, these attitudes mean people may hide their diagnosis for fear of missing out on everyday opportunities.

Denise added: “Just because someone has a mental health issue does not mean they’re not capable of looking after children.

“I look after my friends’ children and they all are aware of my mental health.

“There needs to be better understanding because experiencing difficulties with your mental health doesn’t mean you stop being a person.”

The If It’s Okay campaign aims to challenge the root cause of the shame that many people who live with mental illness experience.

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