Picture the scene.
The busy heart of an Angus town as the festive rush begins to take on increased momentum, tempers fray and seasonal cheer evaporates like sna aff the proverbial dyke.
Frustration setting in after being foiled in the latest attempt to lay hands on this year’s must-have pressie for the wee ones, a head of steam is building behind the wheel as a queue forms to pass a motor abandoned on double yellows.
Fear not rule-abiding citizens, there’s a fast-approaching warden – whose return to local pavements has made a remarkable difference to the smooth flow of our town centres.
But also rushing back is the lawless driver, dog on lead in one hand and the last delicious remnants of a burger and chips in the other.
He spots the hi-viz enforcer preparing the £60 windscreen decoration.
In a desperate attempt to dodge the fine our double-yellow-ignoring man jettisons his takeaway.
But he’s halted in his tracks as Fido digs his heels in, hunkers down and responds with some vigour to the call of nature.
It’s a full house of byelaw bingo – a steaming pile of doggie doo beside a discarded takeaway carton and the pechin’, badly-parked litter lout.
But Santa does exist and he’s come early for our miscreant because, as things stand, multi-tasking is not permitted on the streets of Angus and the upshot is, that while he’ll have to take the £60 parking hit, litter lad is off the hook for the poop and polystyrene carton misdemeanours.
It turns out that rules made elsewhere dictate that if a community warden is involved in traffic duty then that’s the hat they must wear and other regulatory powers have to stay in the pocket.
There’s universal disquiet that hands are effectively being tied behind backs in the very worthwhile efforts to keep our streets clean and free-flowing, and the council seems as eager as anyone to arm their staff with the full arsenal of capabilities.
Hopefully the accidental season of goodwill will soon be at an end for people like Fido’s keeper.
