A drink-driver directed Harry Potter-themed abuse at police and threatened to bomb Dunfermline station after she was caught behind the wheel.
Kelly McLaren made the “ridiculous” decision to drive 300 yards home from Kinross Golf Club after drinking pitchers of Martini.
Horrified guests called police when they saw the 29-year-old accelerating away with two children in her car.
When police caught up with her, McLaren – with “her eyelashes hanging off” – turned hostile, threatening to murder cops and calling one officer a “Harry Potter-looking f***er.”
And when she arrived at the Dunfermline charge bar, she boasted she knew people in the Ulster Defence Association and “how to make a petrol bomb”.
McLaren appeared at Perth Sheriff Court and admitted drink-driving (83mics/ 22) and causing fear and alarm on June 8 this year.
Sped away from golf club
Fiscal depute Stephanie Paterson, prosecuting, said witnesses at Kinross Golf Club noted McLaren was “obviously intoxicated” by 6.30pm.
“She was observed consuming alcohol from pitchers, getting further and further intoxicated.
“The accused was then seen snatching her car keys from one of the children, who had been running about with them.”
One concerned guest decided to follow McLaren, to take a note of her car registration plate.
“The accused was seen putting the children into the vehicle and then getting into the driver’s seat,” the fiscal depute said.
“She started the engine, then turned it off and then back on again, before driving off down the single lane at speed.”
McLaren’s Ford Zetec was seen coming to “an abrupt stop” at the main road.
“The accused sounded her horn for no reason,” said Ms Paterson.
“She then turned left and disappeared out of view, towards the direction of Kinross High Street.”
Eyelashes hanging off
Just after 8.30pm, officers found the Ford parked 20 metres from McLaren’s home.
“An associate of the accused’s answered the door of her house,” said Ms Paterson.
“The accused was traced within, clearly intoxicated and holding onto a wall for balance.”
She began shouting and swearing at police, telling them: “F*** off and get out of my house. Who do you think you are?”
Ms Paterson said: “She continued to sway, her eyelashes were hanging off and she was slurring her words.
“She was highly agitated and irrational, appearing to take a dislike to one officer as he tried to engage with her.”
McLaren told him: “F*** off, you Harry Potter-looking f***er.”
She told the officers: “I will find out who your f***ing family are and murder them.”
When she refused to stop making threats, she was handcuffed.
McLaren admitted she had been driving, telling officers: “It was me. Why?”
She said the last thing she drank was a pitcher of Martini.
En route to custody at Dunfermline, she banged her head off the van cage and kicked the inside of the vehicle.
She screamed: “I will f***ing get you both murdered. I have family in Ireland who will find out where you live.”
During the journey, police had to pull over, take her out of the van and readjust her handcuffs.
At the charge bar, she said she “knows how to make a petrol bomb” and “knows people in the UDA.”
‘Bad decisions’
Solicitor Alan Davie, defending, said: “She made a series of bad decisions on this day.
”She had gone to the event but unfortunately she consumed more alcohol than she should have.
“That led to a disagreement with her partner, which led to the particularly bad decision to go to her car with the two children.
“She knows that this was potentially dangerous and put them at risk.
”The golf club is only 300 yards from her home address. It was a ridiculous decision.”
Mr Davie said his client was remorseful, ashamed and full of regret.
”This was very much out of character. I’d like to think that this was a one-off.”
Custody ‘available’
Sheriff Simon Collins KC said: “What a shameful episode.
“The level of intoxication at the time of driving would likely have been substantially more than it was when she was tested some four hours later and she put the children at substantial risk.”
He said: “In principle, a custodial sentence is available to the court but that is not appropriate in Ms McLaren’s case, in particular because she is a first offender.”
McLaren, of Green Park, Kinross, was fined £375 and banned from driving for 18 months.
She must further stay home each night between 8pm and 7am as part of a six week restriction of liberty order.
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