Whenever I get too fretful about what is going on in that there America lately, I tend to comfort myself by watching reruns of the West Wing.
Trouble is, I’ve been doing this so much, I have started getting terribly tangled up in trying to distinguish fact from fiction.
In effect, I am supplying myself with fake news and cutting out the middle man.
This was highlighted when The Teenager tweeted Toby (played by Richard Schiff) from the West Wing after we had watched a particularly moving episode — and he tweeted back.
This left my poor addled brain reeling. Is he real? In which case, is President Jed Bartlet in charge over there? Are we all saved?
I did calm down after a wee nap in a darkened room but it made me wonder how many other people are conjuring up an alternative reality for themselves to cope with what is actually happening.
Just me then? Fair enough.
Of course, some things I assume I’ve made up turn out to be true.
Did anyone else see the stories about Johnny Depp’s wine bills? According to court papers in a case where he is suing his management for mismanaging his earnings, the actor spends £23,800 a month on wine. Yes, a month.
I imagine a typical day in the life of Mr Depp must go something like this: “Can you bring me a cup of tea please? With some of that Chateauneuf du Pape instead of milk. And bring it to me in the bath. Fill the bath with champagne would you?
“When I’m dressed in my piratey clothes, I shall go out and water the lawn with a hosepipe full of vintage Cabernet Sauvignon before swimming in my lake of Louis Roederer Cristal.” All quite sticky, I would imagine.
But the best use of his vast fortune was surely the £2.4 million he spent on firing Hunter S Thompson’s ashes from a cannon.
As my regular reader is aware, I very much approve of slebs using their sleb status for this kind of over-the-top nonsense that we mortals can only dream of.
Although I may have dreamt it, to be fair.