Why did the chicken cross the road?
That was my youngest’s opening gambit to the stranger whose door we’d knocked on in the name of guising last Halloween.
The man did have a lantern in his garden (code for kids welcome) but he also looked like he had just woken up, was confused and… there was no sign of treats.
“I don’t know,” he said, “Why did the chicken cross the road?”
“To get to the idiot’s house,” Guthrie said. “Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?” The man said. “And is this the same joke?”
“The chicken,” Guthrie said.
The man, who lived on a Halloween-friendly cul-de-sac near Invergowrie scratched his head.
“I don’t get it,” he said.
It was clear he wasn’t going to pretend to get it either – and still there was no sign of sweets.
Guthrie repeated his schtick two more times before the man realised that in the joke, he was the idiot.
I didn’t think he was going to stop laughing.
His own children were out trick or treating with their mum and he’d fallen asleep watching telly after an early shift at work.
He only had some digestives by way of treats – but after a rummage in his drawer came back with a pound coin for each of the boys – and they’ve never forgotten the thrill.
It’s an odd concept is it not – to knock on doors and get stuff.
‘I wish Halloween was every second Friday’
Candy, as the Americans call it, with their over the top Halloween celebrations making their way here – year by year, getting bigger and bigger.
Quite unexpectedly, it’s one of my favourite bits of parenthood and a highlight of the year.
Granted we all fall out before breakfast, but I love the face painting and costume finessing for school dress up. I love them being in their own wee worlds and wish it could happen every second Friday.
As we’ve discussed before, it’s Scotland where the Celtic tradition of Halloween started – to mark the dark nights coming in and spirits floating around.
And there’s a fundamental principle that’s very Scottish lying behind every door a child knocks on October 31.
That you’ve got to give them something in return.
For the swetchies, make them laugh – like that man did.
Want to stay up with the adults? Then the party piece better be good.
To get into college or university, put in the work and study hard. To get the job, try harder than every applicant. To get a promotion, arrive early, leave late. To lose the belly, work out.
A simple equation of giving and getting.
It’s said the younger generations don’t know how to graft – that they want it all for little effort.
I don’t wholly believe that and see fierce ambition with many young people. But, like that man behind the door, it’s up to us to show them that some things are worth trying for.
And it may be a particularly Dundee thing that, if you also manage to offend them while being funny, you’ll get a belly laugh and hard cash as reward.
Happy Halloween.
Conversation