In the game of porcelain thrones, a Fife town has shown the competition is a busted flush by owning Scotland’s loo of the year.
The toilets at Harbourmaster’s House in Dysart, which is Fife Coast and Countryside Trust’s (FCCT) headquarters, have laid down a marker for the rest after coming tops in the national beaches category.
And your intrepid reporter was sent to do a review of the pew and experience first-hand what made this loo so special.
With the fresh harbour air, the sea lapping in the background and the gulls squawking overhead, I could barely wait to spend a penny in the award-winning toilet.
As soon as the door to the gent’s opened I was engulfed in a wave of sweet-smelling lavender. There is no need to kick up a stink over the inside either.
The toilets were judged against criteria including dcor and maintenance, cleanliness, accessibility, hand washing and drying equipment, and overall management.
And this toilet was clean, the soap dispensers were full to the brim, and contrary to many other toilets in establishments throughout the region, the hand dryers actually worked.
Apart from that, though, the rest was, dare I say it, bog standard?
There was nothing out of the ordinary to suggest why this had made Scotland’s toilet ‘roll of honour’.
Now bear in mind your reporter could only enter the male toilet, so I’m sure the female offering was a palace of beauty and splendour.
However, with a wealth of walkers trekking up and down the Fife Coastal Path, any sweet-smelling, clean, working facilities are sure to be a welcome sight.
Other toilets looked after by the trust at Aberdour Silver Sands and Kingsbarns received gold awards, while the Elie Harbour and Ruby Bay facilities won silver awards.
The chief executive of FCCT, Amanda McFarlane said: “We are very proud of these achievements.
“Fife Council transferred responsibility for these facilities to us less than a year ago, so this is a wonderful recognition of their dedication in maintaining this very important service.”