Defiantly proving wrong the schoolteacher who said I was such a feckless daydreamer I’d never stick at anything for long, T2G’s annual Bungs have reached their seventh annual edition.
That’s long enough of a “tradition” to get the Bungs, still appealingly rendered in the finest plastics with the gold foil flaking only slightly, labelled a “major” by the Champions Tour or the LPGA.
But enough with this emotional stuff, let’s get cracking on the 13 categories that have remained basically unchanged since those distant days of 2008 when I first realised this was an easy way to fill a column in a week when there’s no golf anywhere in the world.
Player of the Year: We addressed the blue riband Bung in last week’s T2GCOUSIN ADAM, Masters champion, gets the nod.
Tournament of the Year: No Medinah-like standout in the top level game this year, so I’m going for a purely personal choice. The final of the SCOTTISH BOYS at Monifieth was played in quite magnificent fashion, in glorious weather (for early April) and in front of an appreciative gallery between Bradley Neil of Blairgowrie and St Andrews’ Ewan Scott. Every digit I have is crossed in the hope these two exceptional young talents from our area develop into outstanding players in the future.
Round of the Year: Stuart Manley’s round at the World Cup featuring a hole-in-one and an 11 on the next hole, while a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence, can’t really qualify as a round and fails on this Bung’s historical commemoration of excellence. Instead, it has to be PHIL MICKELSON’s final round to win the Open at Muirfield, where he crept up almost unnoticed as much as Phil could ever be unnoticed to win with a 66. For further context, see below.
Shot of the Year: I generally save this Bung for a shot that won a major, it probably being the most significant shot a player has hit in his life (best past example – YE Yang on the final hole at Hazeltine in 2009). That’s certainly the case for this year’s cast-iron winner, JUSTIN ROSE’s four-iron right over the flag on the 18th at Merion, which secured his US Open triumph.
Depression of the Year: Despite the R&A’s platitudes at Muirfield, there’s no sign of a shift on equality. But to me the most regrettable thing about the issue was that the historic achievements of Inbee Park and the European Solheim Cup team in 2013 were largely ignored by the mainstream news media after they had their fill of the single-sex club issue and had moved on to the next outrage, showing just how sincere they were about promoting women’s golf in the first place.
Non-event of the Year: It was so dull that the best story was a bored Lindsay Vonn sticking a live squirrel on boyfriend Tiger Wood’s shoulder. Would have been funnier if she’d stuck it down his MC Hammer-style trousers, but it was the only interest in the PRESIDENTS CUP, no-one’s idea of rival to the Ryder Cup.
Reassurance of the Year: In a world of high-tech nurturing when players in developmental strands can’t even sniff without someone lifting a hankie to their noses, there was huge encouragement for old-school diehards this year. CRAIG LEE and CHRIS DOAK, both products of Scotland’s club pro circuit and in their mid-thirties, became established European Tour players after years of struggling through minor tours. I don’t think either has ever attended a nutrition seminar.
Trophy of the Year: Regular readers will know how much I love truly hideous golf trophies, and there were new candidates in 2013 in this noble tradition. The LPGA’s KEB Hanabank Championship, featuring what appear to be an enormous wooden rabbit emerging from a tin can, caught my eye as did the Volvo China Open’s huge melting blue candle.
But let’s give a lifetime achievement award this year to a perennial contender, the Johnnie Walker Championship trophy, as it appears it will be retired after the tournament’s sabbatical in 2014. Apparently constructed from the debris of an IKEA cabinet demolished by a sledgehammer, it also features a shot of whisky encased in a glass sphere that you can’t actually drink. Which is enough to get me furious.
Stat Line of the Year: Back to the final day at Muirfield, for a numerical appreciation of just how good Phil’s final 66 was. On a course that progressively got more difficult as each day progressed, drying out in a heatwave, only one other player in the top 25 going into the final round shot under 70 on Sunday (Ian Poulter, 67). Only three more players shot PAR or better. Phil was six shots better than Adam Scott, eight shots better than Tiger, nine better than Lee Westwood. Astonishing.
Shank of the Year: Not a shank, but this Bung rarely goes to one, instead being awarded to the worst shot of the season. Therefore it has to be tee shot at the long 17th by TIGER WOODS at Muirfield on the Saturday night. He’d just drawn level at the top of the leaderboard with Lee Westwood, and tried to a low tracer with a three-wood. It was a terrible mis-hit that barely reached the fairway, and he compounded that by failing to clear the fairway cross-bunkers. A potential eagle became a bogey six, and Tiger wasn’t a factor for the rest of the Open.
Comeback of the Year: Two stand-up guys up for this bung in 2013 – Paul Casey for the way he won the Irish Open after a good few injury and off-course struggles, but the winner is DAVID HOWELL, quite possibly the nicest chap on the world circuit, who has battled back from an ignominious fall down the rankings where he was reduced to being keynote speaker at the Association of Golf Writers’ annual dinner (he was very good) claiming another big payday at the Alfred Dunhill Links Championship. Both men should be gunning for Gleneagles in September.
The Torch (or best emerging player): LYDIA KO reached fifth in the Rolex Rankings as an amateur. Now she’s turned pro the curious decision to ditch her lifelong coach last week notwithstanding who can tell what’s she going to do. And she’s not 17 until mid-April.
The Dropped Torch (or most disappointing slump): This torch has not been actually dropped but just laid down for a while. RORY McILROY, as we will find when we address 2014 in next week’s T2G, is going to pick it up again with a vengeance.