QUACKDOWN.
We have the sensational tale of the Fifer who has set out on a “one man, one duck” mission to save the nation from a plague of “supersize” ducks.
The plucky fella also a pole-dancng instructor has taken upon himself to educate park-goers about the folly of flinging white bread to the local pondlife.
It isn’t nutritious and it doesn’t do them any good. It really is a rather sombre warning.
You would, I feel obliged to say, be quackers to miss it.
We also have more much more on Thursday’s “miracle” at sea.
It is a sensational tale of survival against the odds. Find out what the two men at the centre of the incredible drama made of it all and hear from their flabbergasted family.
Apologies for that slight deviation from animal-related news.
But it’s back with a bang as we meet the Dundee lady who is going out of her mind with concern after her pole cat vaulted to freedom.
Actually, to be precise, the wily creature headbutted its way to freedom. Get the whole story in Friday’s Courier.
It cannot (actually it can) have escaped your notice that Thursday was European election day.
We have full reports of all the day’s excitement (ahem).
Would you like to see what the new Forth Crossing will look like?
If the answer to that question is “damn right” or indeed, more prosaically, “yes” then my word have we got a treat for you?
We most certainly do. In the form of images showing what the new Forth Crossing will look like. It really does do what it says on the tin.
In sport, Jackie McNamara’s name has been mentioned in connection with the Celtic manager’s job in the wake of Neil Lennon’s departure, but one of his Dundee United players tells us he’s not worried.
There are ins and outs at St Johnstone and a former Dundee captain reflects on his time at Dens. It’s enough to make one misty-eyed.
Golf writer Steve Scott is at Wentworth for the BMW PGA, and that’s where Eve Muirhead has written her weekly column from as well. Must be jolly nice.
For more on every last one of these mouthwatering tales, plus others too numerous to mention in this small but perfectly formed (arguably) space, be sure to pick up Friday’s Courier. Alternatively, why not try our digital edition?