The personal hurt of ruling himself out of last weekend’s Scottish Cup semi-final paled into insignificance compared to the torment of watching helplessly as his St Johnstone team-mates toiled on their big day at Hampden, midfielder Chris Millar has revealed.
Millar, who was agonisingly close to being fit for the Motherwell match, now wants to see the Perth side channelling their frustrations into finishing their league campaign in style.
The former Morton man said, “Watching the game was really hard. You can’t do anything to help sitting in the stand.
“We looked great before the game and started it well so it was a massive disappointment to lose bad goals. Unfortunately, mistakes happen. It was a huge frustration to everyone connected with the club.
“Before the game, I tried to be a part of it and I was in the dressing room speaking to the boys, but after it there was nothing I could say to the boys. All the celebrations we were hoping to have were scuppered.
“But we’ve had a few days to get over it and we can’t afford to dwell on the match and let it affect us. It’s time to move on.
“I’m looking forward to playing again. This year’s been one when I’ve had a few niggling injuries, which isn’t something that’s happened too often in my career. It’s been hard to deal with.
“We want to go out on a high this season. Seventh place is there for us and that’s what we’ve got to try and push for now.”
Millar admitted that he had to fight the ingrained desire of a footballer to defy injury and play on Saturday, but ultimately there wasn’t a decision for him to take.
He explained, “I knew by the Friday that I wouldn’t make it. It was a case of being 24 or 48 hours too soon, unfortunately.
“The gaffer was of the mindset that if I wasn’t ready by the Friday afternoon, I wouldn’t be ready for the game.
“I couldn’t take the risk of pulling up after 10 minutes in such a big game.
“There’s part of you that thinks you could do it. I was trying to push it and even on the Saturday morning I’d have taken a fitness test.
“But I had to admit defeat and I wouldn’t have been doing myself, and most importantly the team, any justice by playing. My groin wasn’t right and I had to be strong enough to admit that.”
Steven Anderson and Michael Duberry are both suspended for Saints’ next two games, the first of which is against Inverness Caley Thistle on Monday, while Graham Gartland has a groin problem.
Manager Derek McInnes said, “It will be a chance for one or two players that haven’t played as much as they’d have liked.
“The players might still be feeling sorry for themselves and wanting to restart for next season.
“If I am honest there is an element of that about myself. But we can’t afford to wallow in self-pity or just look forward to starting again next season.
“It is important the supporters see us working hard for results in the next few weeks. They have to see application and effort from us.
“We are under no illusions. It is important to try and finish the season on a positive note. That’s what we are trying to do here.
“We want professional performances. Maybe there will be one or two youngsters getting games and others trying to make up my mind for next season. But we are focused and working extremely hard in training.”